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Two Shadchanim

If 2 shadchanim redt the same girl to a person, can the person select the 2nd shadchan to go with or he must use the first one? Assuming that no communication has been initiated yet between the shadchan & the girl.

Answer:

If a person is more comfortable with the second shadchan for continuing with the Shidduch, he has a right to do so (provided the second shadchan thought of it himself and didn’t take the idea from the first).

A shadchan only receives his halachic status if he brings together the parties – whether as an “idea” (the matchil) or in actual fact. If two have the same idea, you are free to choose between them.

For more details on the subject please see here. See also Rosh (105) and Noda Biyhuda (36). In our case, nothing has started yet, and whoever initiates the connection is the maschil.

Best wishes.

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